Baby Bjorn for Dolls

The ultimate baby crap survival list. Plus the stuff that is actual crap.

Many of you have emailed me looking for recommendations for baby stuff…like what’s awesome and what blows. And by many, I mean 3. But I have a lot of pregnant friends and friends with new babies who could benefit from this. I know I could have when I was buying every.single.thing. on the babies r us shelves. See baby stores are a lot like cults. They’re all, if you don’t do what we say and buy ALL OF THIS bullshit, your baby will be stupid, not gain weight and a social outcast amongst other babies. And then the world will end. And you’re like, SHIT I DON’T WANT A DUMB SKINNY LOSER BABY. So you buy it all. Here’s where I come in and save all the babies of the world from cults. Or something…

Let’s start with shit you need to make your life better:

If your baby is like mine and thinks that every time he gets in the car it’s driving him straight to the fires of hell, you need this.

Baby Einstein Lights & Melodies Mirror

This is like baby hypnosis. It’s plays songs and lights up AND has a mirror. That’s like a baby fun trifecta. Bonus, you can spy on your baby from your rear view mirror. Negative is that you need to have a head rest to attach it to. Or you could be like me and staple gun it to the fabric of your seat and have your husband roll his eyes at your shotty work. Then you can say WELL YOU FIGURE IT OUT.

This one doesn’t have to be specifically THIS doll. But you need A doll. And no I don’t care if you have a boy. We made sure that G associated this doll with sleep. So whenever he goes in the crib, we give him ghost dog (see it’s a dog head with no body…ghost dog) and he squeezes it and rolls over. It’s comfort for him. I like the ones that are part blanket part doll head. Because it’s creepy.

Orange Dog Snuggler 13″

Ours is blue…in case you want to get real weird about it.

This one is big. REALLY big. When I was pregnant I was like, look at those idiots buying the 200 dollar swing. I’m going to be smart and get the 40 dollar swing. And then my baby came out and hated the 40 dollar swing and after 5 days of no napping, I got my ass to babies r us and bought that 200 dollar swing. And that swing got us through 2 months of naps. Seriously. G just didn’t like being really low to the ground. He wanted to be up higher and feel the warmth of the money spent on this goddamn thing. Seriously, would have paid double.

Fisher-Price My Little Snugabunny Cradle ‘n Swing

He still uses it for chill out time. Like around 5pm when I have wine.

I know you’re going to get all yelly at me for this one, but hear me out. One of you suggested this to me in my comments and we haven’t looked back. We use these diapers at night instead of cloth now. I know there are other options but I’m tired. I’m just tired. These are amazing. They can weigh 3lbs with pee but they are dry so the baby feels nothing AND STAYS ASLEEP. There is nothing worse than fully waking up the baby after changing him in the middle of the night. Slap one of these on at night and change in the morning. BAM. DONE. And I don’t want to hear it.

Huggies Overnites Diapers, Size 3, 76 Count

This also falls under the category of baby hypnosis. G didn’t take a pacifier so this was my trick if he freaked out. For some reason he stared at it and calmed down right quick. Gold.

Baby Einstein Take Along Tunes

This is our stroller. I could have convinced B to get a fancy expensive one. But I preferred this one. Why? Those expensive bitches are heavy. I mean they are close to the price of a car and probably weigh close to the weight of a car. I could barely push them around, let alone put them in and out of the car. This one is light and easy, that’s what he said. There is a little handle right where they sit that folds the thing up in one motion. We take a walk every day and I really do love it. Note: it’s not a jogging stroller. I don’t jog. That’s for weirdos.


You might also like:

BabyBjorn Comfort Carrier -
BabyBjorn Comfort Carrier -


2005-12-23 15:08:00 by BabydollQ

My DD is *so* ready for a doll. She is 2 and is obsessed with babies. She tries to diaper her stuffed animals, etc.
Shall I splurge adn get her a Bitty Baby doll? Does anyone here have those dolls? (THey look so cute but I wonder if they have phthalates in their bodies?)
Or should I get something more Waldorf-like? If the latter, can I get clothes and accessories?

ERGObaby ERGObaby Original Doll Carrier, Giraffe
Baby Product (ERGObaby)
  • 100% cotton canvas body construction
  • Padded shoulder and waist straps
  • Machine wash and dry, gentle cycle

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